What Is Worry and What Can We Do About It?
In last week’s blog, we saw the difference between anxiety and worry. Today we are taking a closer look at worry. Sometimes worry affects us too much. But how do we know it’s too much?
How do you know the difference between Normal Worry & Abnormal Worry?
Do you worry about things that most people do not worry about (such as weeds in the garden)?
Do you worry about things that others worry about but in a more exaggerated manner (such as the safety of your children)?
Do you find it very difficult to stop worrying, and have trouble relaxing as a result?
Do you worry much of the time about a problem without ever reaching a possible solution?
Do you believe that, if you do not worry, a terrible event will actually occur?
Do you worry about not being worried, or worry when everything is going well in your life?
Do you believe that you will go crazy with worrying?
If you answer yes to most of these questions you are probably experiencing more worry than is normal.
What we tell ourselves about our worry
Even though it hasn’t happened in the past, it still could happen.
Negative events have not happened yet because I have always managed to prevent them.
I have had bad things happen before, and I don’t want them to happen again, so by worrying, I can prepare myself for the worst and be ready.
Because I think about my children being kidnapped, then they could be kidnapped.
Abnormal Worry versus Life Crisis
Many people experience anxiety symptoms when going through a major trauma or life crisis. The major difference between trauma or life crisis and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) is:
GAD does not depend on negative major life events. GAD’s main aspect is that people are worrying about things when there is no real threat.
Symptoms similar to GAD caused by life crises have a shorter time span. If a crisis happened 6 months ago and the symptoms are still felt it is probable that the crisis was the trigger for GAD.
What can I do about my worry?
When you start to worry, think about making a plan. If you can, write the plan down. If you can’t make a plan, tell the worry you can’t worry about it now.
Fight the negative thoughts. Write down the negative thought and then write down the opposite, write the truth, or restate the negative thought into a positive one.
Understand your worry will not prevent anything from happening.
Change your worry in another direction. Read a book, do some physical activity, or talk to a trusted friend about your worry.
Stay in the present, in the moment.
RESOURCE RECOMMENDATIONS
Be Anxious for Nothing, Max Lucado. (Biblical/Spiritual)
Calming the Emotional Storm, Van Dijk (DBT).
Mastery of Your Anxiety and Worry, Craske & Barlow. (CBT)
Mastery of Your Anxiety and Panic, Barlow & Craske. (CBT)
No Worries, Eng (Christian).
Overcoming Anxiety, Worry and Fear, Jantz (Christian/CBT).
Running Scared, Welch (Christian/Biblical).
When I Am Afraid, Welch (Christian/Biblical).
Written by: Gerard DeMatteo
About Gerard:
Gerard has been providing that with compassionate counseling, providing hope and giving encouragement to people who are struggling. For over 20 years as pastoring elder at a local church in New Jersey, Gerard has been teaching, discipling, providing pre-marital and marital counsel, and pastoral counseling to both individuals and groups as well as being a resource to those in his greater church network.