Making Peace with Stress: Tools to Help You Breathe Easier
When Stress Shows Up: How to Show Up for Yourself
Stress is unavoidable—it’s part of the human experience. Whether it’s looming deadlines or preparing for an important meeting, we all face moments of acute or short-term stress. More ongoing stressors, like difficult relationships or chronic physical or mental health challenges, can lead to long-term or chronic stress.
Stress doesn’t just live in our minds—it shows up in our bodies. What do you notice physically when you’re feeling overwhelmed? Common somatic symptoms of stress include headaches, muscle tension, digestive issues, restlessness, or sleep disturbances. When stress becomes chronic, it can contribute to more serious conditions like heart disease, gastrointestinal problems, anxiety, or depression.
Take a moment to reflect on how you’ve been managing stress lately. You may have noticed people in your life coping through procrastination, emotional eating, substance use, or isolation. Maybe you recognize some of those habits in yourself. The truth is, we don’t need to fight stress—we need to shift our perspective and learn how to work with it, not against it.
Rethinking Stress: A Perspective Shift
Our bodies were designed to handle stress. Hormones like cortisol and the “fight or flight” response are part of a built-in survival mechanism that has helped humans navigate threats for generations. Stress in itself isn’t inherently bad—it’s our relationship with it that can make all the difference.
Research suggests that when we view some stress as helpful or motivating, we can actually reduce its harmful effects. It’s not just about eliminating stress but learning how to reinterpret it and respond with intention.
It conveys disgust and superiority. It erodes love and builds resentment.
Tools to Manage and Transform Stress
Here are a few evidence-based techniques to help you build resilience and take back control:.
1. Practice Body-Based Relaxation Techniques
Because stress lives in the body, physical strategies like deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or visualization can help restore calm. These practices activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which reduces physical stress responses.
2. Use Gratitude and Mindfulness
Take moments throughout the day to focus on what you’re thankful for. Practicing gratitude shifts your attention toward the positive, reducing the emotional weight of stress. Try listing three things you’re grateful for each morning or evening.
3. Reset Your Nervous System
For those carrying chronic stress, especially tied to trauma or anxiety, activating the vagus nerve can help regulate your nervous system. Try bilateral tapping: cross your arms over your chest and gently tap one hand at a time for 1–3 minutes. This technique promotes grounding and regulation.
4. Make One Self-Care Change
What’s one small thing you could do today to better care for yourself? Maybe it’s eating regular meals, setting a boundary, or taking a mindful break between tasks. Returning to your basic needs can reduce stress in meaningful ways.
5. Lean on Your Support System
Talking things through, even without a solution, can be healing. Connection, validation, and being heard are powerful tools for reducing stress. Don’t underestimate the value of being seen by someone who cares.
Stress Doesn’t Have to Be the Enemy
Stress is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to control you. By equipping yourself with the right mindset and supportive tools, you can begin to change your relationship with stress. These small, consistent steps can help you feel more grounded, more capable, and more at peace.
You deserve to live a life that isn’t defined by pressure but by presence, purpose, and resilience.
Helping individuals, families, and teens overcome life’s challenges and find healing. Christina is in Midland Park, Fort Lee, and telehealth. Sessions are available in English and Korean.